Louise Hay’s Wisdom Cards (Beautiful Card Deck)

So here’s the latest scoop on the Col front.

I make mistakes.

I know, I know, shocking huh.

A fascinating thing has been unfolding this week and I felt inspired to share it with you.

First, I didn’t feel well.

Then I judged myself.

Then I got confused.

They say what you think about and talk about you bring about so under that theory, if a pal asks, “Hey Col, how ya doin’ today?” and I answer, “Not feelin’ too well” … which, of course, is the honest truth … am I then attracting more of the same?

On top of that, I used to (note the “used to” … cuz I’m gonna change this stuff ) judge myself.

Why am I not well? I should be fine. Why am I not fine? What did I do wrong to make myself not fine? Have I not been following doctor’s orders? Why have I not been following doctor’s orders, how hard is it to follow doctor’s orders, what’s wrong with me anyway?

Benjamin Zander says … if you make a mistake, throw up your hands and exclaim, “How fascinating!”

He talks about being in the downward spiral vs living the rest of your life in possibility. He also teaches that scarcity and abundance are not assessments of the situation but reflections of attitude.

Towards the end of the week my friend Rant sent me an Abraham-Hicks recording, which I began listening to as I lay down. Funny thing is, I didn’t realize it was on endless loop so I listened to the whole thing, then fell asleep and it began again.

And again.

And again.

The whole night I kept floating back up to semi-consciousness over and over, aware of Esther’s words wafting in around the far edges of my sleepy mind.

And here is what she was saying:

“The problem with you is, you keep wanting to speak the truth. You tell how it is. And if how it is isn’t how you want it to be, why keep talking about it? Tell the story how you want it to be.”

So I decided.

If I have a day that is 10% well and 90% unwell, I am going to voice the well. I’m going to do this for a week, like a game, and see how it goes.

That’s the first thing.

Second thing is:

Dang, girl, quit abusing the only Col we’ve got! If I didn’t do something perfectly and as a result I don’t feel well, I’ll say to myself, “Self, aah, interesting. Not well. Feel like lying down? Yes? Well ok then I guess we’re going to lie down now.”

And that’s it. No judgment, just observe. I made a mistake, how fascinating!

Here is the delightful Benjamin Zander, talking about making mistakes and radiating possibility…

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Special thanks to the peace-inducing Elyse Hope Killoran for pointing me in the direction of the inspiring and delightful Benjamin Zander … to Betsy for magical visions and for reminding me to stop beating myself up … to Rant for giving the amazing and generous gift of wisdom and Abraham … to Christine for always listening and supporting me with daily reminders appreciating who I am and prompting weekly joy recharges … and to Sly for his friendship and for making my friend a beautiful song of her very own! And to all four of you for all of the touching “Col is” appreciations which came in my eggs and made my heart smile real big. See more of Louise Hay’s beautiful card deck, Wisdom Cards.
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“I’m pissed off at my dreamboard!”

I remember saying that two years ago. I had this gorgeous creation, with the exact guy and the exact house and the exact scenario all mapped out … and it was just *not* happening. So I would walk by and give my dreamboard a little gesture along with the squinty-eyed look of death.

Not exactly the ideal place to create from!

At the time I completely misunderstood Law of Attraction and in this moment, I’ve found a better way of moving into the emotion of what you desire.

Futurization

If you like, you can envision your future reality and make it big and bright and juicy and if that works for you, great! At times I can get into it and those times are powerful … but in other moments, there is this blaring knowledge that my present is something different and apart.

Pastification

Remembering a past event when you did live your dream grounds you in the knowledge and understanding that it is very clearly possible. This is moving in the right direction. But still there may be that separation, that knowledge that this is not my reality NOW.

What do you do when you find yourself wading in a sea of counterproductive feelings? What about the times when where you are at feels like quicksand?

What works for *me* is getting into the now.

Look at what you want things to be like. Then ask, “Ok, where can I find a tiny little piece of that right here and now?”

Embrace it. Take it in, appreciate it, hug it and kiss it and savor its presence. Expand on it and make it big and bright and beautiful.

You want to be prosperous? Look around you. Do you have a TV? Do you have food to eat? A roof over your head? A phone? We’re ahead of the game. Many people in this world do not have these things. We are truly truly prosperous.

Or at least embrace the concept that you have a tiny little taste of prosperity and look around you in every direction to find proof that this is so. Gather as much evidence as you can, big or small. Best to start small.

You are crafting a line to pull yourself out of the quicksand.

You want to be in a loving relationship? Who loves you now? Your mother, your father, your best friend, your cat? Collect all of your proof and roll around in it. Be grateful that you are so very loved.

You want your brother to be more positive? He has said ten unpleasant things … has he said one decent thing? Even just one? Thank him for the one, either directly or to yourself. Focus on what you appreciate.

What you focus on expands. Build yourself a little story, a little bridge out of the muck. The beginnings can be so-so. They can be tiny proof, little itty bitty so-so proof. Give thanks for the tiny proof. Then be on the lookout for one step bigger proof. You will find it. I know you will.

Begin crafting your story and adding and adding until you find your way out. This is the strongest form of visualization, at least for me … one which begins with a grounded seed of truth and is built up little by little until the vision is full and rich. Then you can grab hold of it.

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After writing this article, I discovered a great book by Sonia Miller called The Attraction Distraction: Why the Law of Attraction Isn’t Working for You and How to Get Results – FINALLY! I’ve heard Sonia speak and consider her one of the great LOA teachers. What she shares is straightforward, tangible and clears up a lot of the misconceptions about Law of Attraction. :: Visit Rocks in My Dryer for more Works-For-Me-Wednesday ideas! :: Share on Facebook

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Buy “Dreaming of You” art print at AllPosters.com

Sadness helps us grieve and let go. If we repress and deny sadness, we will inevitably become depressed. Psalm 30:5 says, “weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” Sadness is always the path to joy, because sadness signals a hurt that needs to be processed.

- Changes That Heal by Henry Cloud

Sadness is not depression. In fact, suppressing sadness can lead to depression.

“What? You’re full of it, Col!”

Oh if you only knew how not full if it I am, you’d be amazed!

Lately I’ve been allowing sadness to coexist and I have to tell you … I’ve never been happier!

Yes, it’s true.

Interesting thing about that. I used to wish it didn’t exist. And that only made me feel worse when it came. I’d feel sad and then on top of that, I’d feel upset about the sadness being there.

Not a good situation. Kind of a double-whammy.

Now that I allow it, it moves through me pretty quickly and it is not nearly as intense or scary. This is what works for me. It may work for you.

Express not repress.

• If I feel sadness, I may cry.

• I may lie down with a soft fluffy blanket for a few minutes (who are we kidding, maybe an hour even).

• I might talk to a friend (a really good one who knows I’m doing it to move through it not to wallow in it … big diff.)

• I accept it and respect it.

• I may ask, “What are you here to tell me?” (Sadness always answers, if you’re a really good listener.) And “tell” often means “teach.”

• I might write a little story in my journal.

• I may paint a picture.

But the important thing is the allowing. Because in that lies great power. It’s freeing. And that is what I wish for you, my friend! Freedom, freedom and more freedom. You deserve all the freedom your heart can hold!

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Once upon a time there was a girl who had depression. And it was baaaaaaad. He was a big, hairy monster that slept over every night and ate all her food.

RRRRrrraaAAWRH!

Ooh! y’scared me!

And he would not go away, no matter how hard she tried. I’ll tell you a secret. It hurt so much she wished she could die.

Craigie told me:

There are two ways of “doing” in life and they look the same but couldn’t be more different.

One is running away from the monster and the other is moving towards the light.

When you’re thinking, “I have to pay the bills, I have to do this, I have to do that” and that is pushing you and you’re going, going, going … that’s running from the monster. When you feel pain and you try to run from it, that’s running from the monster.

You’re running so it seems like you must be going somewhere but in truth you’re not getting anywhere. When you’re working at your computer and you begin to feel that stress in your belly … STOP.

Stop and do something. Go for a walk. Take a nap. Pick up the phone. Something which nurtures you.

Am I feeling …

• Hungry?
• Angry?
• Lonely?
• Tired?

• If so, HALT … stop and go take care of that. Nurturing yourself is on the first floor and you can’t go rushing up to the thirty-eighth floor, you need to begin on the first floor.

  When you haven’t taken care of *you*, the monster starts whispering things in your ear and he’s a liar.

  He may tell you that you can’t deal with this. He may tell you you’re not good at living. The monster is lying to you, he wants you dead, the f*cker!

  So there are bills to pay. There are very few truly *big* things in life. Are you going to bed hungry? No. Are you living without a roof over your head? No. You’re safe. You’re ok. And if you’re not, then call me.

  When the pain and fear comes up, sit and meditate on it. Be with it. Don’t escape it, face it head on. It hurts but if you FEEL what the pain is like, you’ll realize that the FEAR of it was much worse and longer than the actual “labor pain” of hurt … it passes in about 30 minutes, I find, truly.

  At the end of the day, put a line down the middle of the piece of paper and ask yourself, “how much of this day was spent with the monster winning and how much of the day was spent moving towards the light?” and hopefully more than half will be the latter. That is your goal.

  Moving towards the light looks like doing things which feel right and good in your soul. Moving towards the light means taking care of *you*. Because if you don’t do that, you’re no good for anyone. You need to begin on the first floor.

  Feed, clothe, rest and comfort your mind and body the way you would an 8 year old you found in the rain in front of your house who had no memory where he/she belonged.

  Craigie wakes up in the morning and goes right down on his knees and thanks God in advance that more time is going to be spent today in moving towards the light. Then he reads something nurturing to line up how he wants his day to go. Before e-mail, before turning the phone on, before anything. Frame your day.

  When I hear the monster, it helps even just to recognize it as the monster and to know that the monster lies. When I hear, “there is so much to do, I can’t do it all, I can’t handle this” I know that there is only one thing to do and that is the one thing I am doing right now. Each moment there is only one thing. And everything is ok and everything will continue to *be* ok.

   

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  Warm hugs and a huge “thank you” to Craigie for requesting the *long* version of my story, for taking the time to listen and to care and for showering me with such strong language and empowering words of wisdom.

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  Share on Facebook :: Visit Rocks in My Dryer for more Works-For-Me-Wednesday ideas! :: Lil’ monster illustration by moi!

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I

am

proactive!

Ok so I was sorta down because I don’t have this fabulous relationship and all this stuff I though I’d have by the age of 42, right? So then I figured, hey … what are some things that I *get* to do because I’m a single girl, with no kids, with no boyfriend, free, and all that? All the things I was bummed about not having, well what are the things I get to do because I don’t have those things? What does happy single Col GET to do?

“Get” is such a great word! I love “get”!

So on Friday night I got to dress up in this ultra-sexy top which I had questioned the plunge of when I bought it (would the guy I was dating approve of all this cleavage? Well, look ma, no guy!) and strappy shoes … oh, right and jean capris, I did in fact have bottoms on … and go out with my friend Veronica to this cool place with brick walls and candlelight to take a salsa class and dance for three hours with this cute 6’ 1” guy who is at least 10 years younger than me and on Saturday night I got to go back and do it all again, why? Because I FELT like it!

And I got to say yes when he asked me to be his dance partner for the rest of the summer.

I got to plan whatever I want for whenever I want.

I got to work out three times last week and I got to feel absolutely great about that.

I got to go kayaking in the crazy, choppy waves with Rich, laughing my butt off and feeling like I was in some bad movie, with some best boy hired to toss buckets of water on me at all the worst moments … NEVER sit in the front, ladies, NEVER sit in the front! “Aaaw, he’s lettin’ me sit in the front, how nice!” NO! It’s NOT nice! He’s a big pussy bastard, that’s what it is!

I got to go to the beach in my bikini and lie in the sun like a little mermaid.

I got to plan to go whitewater rafting with Holly and her super-enthused son. I got to think what other adrenaline-junkie adventures a single mermaid could dream up.

I got to not eat artificial colors and artificial flavors and red wine and cheese and high fructose corn syrup and other things and I got to see that my pain lessened. Which may be a coincidence and may be by design. And I got to choose.

I got to start up a list of what works for me food-wise because certain foods work just great for me and I get to be in control of my life. And sometimes I can have some of what doesn’t work and I can have a little bit of that if I choose and I can also choose not to if I want not to. It’s all about choice.

And moderation.

And nothing is wrong. Just a different choice.

And everything is passing. If I make one choice in this moment, I live with that choice in that moment and tomorrow I will make a new choice, which may be different and it may be similar, it’s ever-evolving.

I had a revelation. I didn’t owe money. I got out of debt and I was so not wanting to be back there. Then I invested money in annarosejewelry.com and suddenly I had debt again, wow I bummed out about that for a bit … it was my fantasy hope to only use money I had and to be tarnish-free for the rest of my life! But you know what? It’s ok. It’s not like I’m ten thousand dollars in debt or something.

Plus, Life is to be lived.

Right? And as far as I can see, I’m not dead yet.