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Creating relationship-reality

November 15th, 2007 by Col


I hereby announce … I plan on being one of the <insert amount here> percent who do not cheat on their person and who have a happily ever after. I googled “% of men cheat” and decided that rather than pondering the mysteries of the divorce rate as I have in the past, I am going to be inspired by the <insert awe-inspiring number here> percent of people who stay together. <Superduper-awe-inspiring amount> is great, right? Wow!!! Can I be in THAT group? Yaay!

Mary, queen of smart, says “Surrender into the reality that it is true … Continue to relax more and more into it. Keep coming back and re-creating.”

See, I get to create my relationship, see?

I get to say how great it is and how full of light and joy and love. I get to say how much we can communicate when a blip happens. And how much I can step up to the plate when I see he needs help. Or ask for what I need when I need a hand.

I promise to understand that it will not always be perfect. I promise to stick through any tough time and to know that it will pass. I promise to do all I can to make sure it’s always as great as it can be and to support one another as much as we can.

What was my goal?

“A delightfully fun-filled, sweet, soulful, supportive, contented, healthy, loving relationship grounded in trust and filled with positive energy with a special, affectionate, easy-going, loyal, supportive, loving man who adores me and laughs with me every day for years to come.”

Mary says I have the opportunity to receive it for a lifetime.

Isn’t that cool? A lifetime!

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Posted in relationship | 1 Comment »

Loving What Is … on a whole new level

November 3rd, 2007 by Col


Today … and just in time, too! … I found this supercool article about How to Change the People Around You. HA! wink

First of all, don’t you just love and smile at and eat up the name of it? It’s just so delicious.

I so despise negativity and when people get mad at traffic and situations … and then I realized that my despising it is just another level of NOT Loving What Is.

Ok now it’s complicated here, try to stay with me!

Level One, which I have mastered beautifully, is to not get mad at the traffic or the situations or the stupid sh*t that arises all around me every day because it is just that. Stupid sh*t.

And it will rear its silly head each and every day as sure as I know the sun will rise.

And I may (or may not … often not) get tweaked for a split second before I realize it’s just stupid everyday stuff that is meant to be there. So often I will not even be irked at all, which is truly a delight. It just does NOT even matter.

If I do get miffed for a moment, I can pretend-vent-scream in my car for a split second and then laugh at the driver who did the exact same inane thing I may have done the week before.

I am doing stupid sh*t ALL the time, let me tell you, I am so imperfect that it allows for other drivers to be let off the hook dozens of times in memory of my own foibles.

And if I have not made that particular transgression, they still get a pass.

So those things are on Level One of Loving What Is.

Now, the more intricate and difficult to master and heretofore completely uncharted territory of Level Two is thinking that others should be Loving What Is. A-ha! You see? What a tricky web we weave when we are trying to be happy and free! We need to drag everybody else in on our joyride and they may not be coming! How dare they not come!

So now I need to allow them to be stuck in the muck. And to know that that is ok and to love that reality. Damn! That was hard for me.

Or not. ;)

They should be Loving What Is … Is that true? Can I really know that that’s true? They should be upset … because they are. That is what is real and true. That is what is happening right now. Accept it and allow it to be.

I have the power to choose what I focus on and I can allow them to be what they are being right now without thinking they shouldn’t be it. I can still be what I am, that does not need to change. They are feeling upset. I am not.

And both things are ok. Both are perfect and right.

I’m up for a challenge. Level Two here I come, I’m ready to play!

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Posted in relationship, revelations 'n inspiration | No Comments »